I went through depression for two years and it wasn’t something that I wanted to openly share to everyone. Just like anyone who suffered from this mental disorder, I continued to live life “normally” as I wanted other people to perceive without knowing the burden that I used to carry everyday.
In my two-year battle, I realized that I couldn’t depend on anyone else but myself. My friends or my family couldn’t instantly remove the pain that I was feeling. It was during those times when my faith was both tested and strengthened. Despite it all, I never ceased to pray.
Most of the days were dark and gloomy when all I wanted to do was shut myself from the world. I was always angry, hot-tempered and full of hatred. Somehow, it seemed like a “ray of light” broke inside and told me to toughen up and put myself back together.
“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it” (The Alchemist, Paolo Coelho)—and this was indeed true. I’ve always thought about pursuing Triathlon as a new sport and it seemed like everything was working well in my favor. I started meeting people who could help me in this new journey. The training alone kept me busy and took all the unwanted thoughts off my mind for the time being. Did you know that exercising helps your body release chemicals called Endorphins a.k.a Happy Hormones? Instead of always feeling sorry for myself, I worked on becoming a better version of myself. It wasn’t easy but small steps worth taking.
If you ask me now if I am still going through depression, well, not anymore but if I get reminded about the past once in a while, I still feel all the pain but the kind of pain that reminds me that I should move forward.
Here’s what I have learned:
Surround yourself with positive people and things. You don’t need additional negativities or stress in your life.
Have a “Me Time”. Being alone doesn’t mean you’re lonely. Take the time to reflect.
Find a hobby that will keep you both busy and happy. Idle hands are the devil’s workshop as they say.
Have a support group or talk to your friends about what you’re going through. They wouldn’t be your real friends if they’re not willing to spend time or lend an ear.
What you’re going through won’t compare to the better things that will happen and turn your life around. Sometimes we tend to focus more on the bad things that we no longer notice all the good things that have happened and are still coming our way. Everything happens for a reason.
Pray. The most important thing to do everyday. Just hang in there.